Disclaimer: I am not a financial advisor and this blog post is my own experience with money.
If you have ever watched movies that are set in casinos or where gambling is a major theme, you would’ve heard the phrase, “the house always wins”. This phrase was made famous in the early 19th century in a gambling house created by a fishmonger turned gambler. If you understand how casinos operate, like any business designed to make a profit. The house edge is the advantage the casino has on you parting with your hard earn cash in hopes of winning big. The probability of you losing varies with each casino game, so knowing your odds is key to striking the jackpot. So how do you create your own house edge so you can strike it rich!?!
Saving For A Rainy Day
Growing up, my mom was the one who managed the finances both for the home and my dad’s business. The trust I saw in their partnership around money was quite rare now that I am an adult and having heard the horror stories from others whose parent’s used money as control and power. Mom stressed the importance of saving, ‘you must always save for a rainy day’ she would often say, and at the age of sixteen, they introduced me to their financial advisor. Ok ladies, at sixteen, I had no job, no money, I wasn’t even allowed to work so what was I doing with a financial advisor!?! My first meeting with Gabor, a Hungarian immigrate who seemed larger than life, wearing gold-rimmed glasses, adorned with a smile he sat behind his large desk with a Ganesh statue behind him (I will never forget that) as he shared his story with me and my brother. He came to Canada with no money, no wealth, no job. He was destined not only to build wealth for himself but for others like him. He always got excited to help the children of his clients start their financial journey no matter how young because he understood the power of compound interest. He told me, if I made $200 a week, I should invest $195. I exclaimed at how absurd that would be having only $5 to live off of. Fast forward 30 years later and I own two properties, a healthy investment portfolio, and a retirement nest egg that doesn’t have me worried about growing old. I built my own house edge that guarantees I will win.
Is Your Relationship With Money Dysfunctional?
Often my conversations with my female fellow warriors around money are ones that don’t come from an empowered place. In fact, when they speak of money with me, it’s always from a place of fear, scarcity, no desire for riches, and completely risk-averse. Ever listen to men speak about money, it’s as if money snuggles up with them in bed giving them much needed comfort and security. The way they talk about stocks and trading, it’s as if it was a sensual irresistible woman desiring them.
You may think relationships are only reserved for another human being, but your relationship with money is a very important one that we often take for granted. Money doesn’t have a heartbeat but yet we give it so much life. My mindset around money was one of scarcity – the feeling of never having enough of it. Feeling like I was spending more than I should be saving – thanks, mom! But understanding your relationship with money is the first step in figuring out what’s been holding you back from taking the first steps onto financial freedom. I wrote a letter to money, poured my heart out, and then released it – this exercise helped me to become clear with my own limiting beliefs around money but more importantly appreciate its ability to bring comforts, peace of mind, and joy – I LOVE MONEY and have no guilt saying that out loud, can you?
Buyer Beware Of Emotional Spending
I’ve purchased and sold properties on my own and the emotional rollercoaster is REAL. Calculating risk void of your emotion is not easy and it often takes outside subject matter expertise to support you through making these big life decisions. I lean on my financial advisor, my parents but more importantly my intuition. The numbers can make complete sense but trusting my intuition has never failed me. I have walked away from opportunities that just didn’t feel right. I’ve gotten clear with knowing the difference when fear shows up versus my gut instinct taking the lead. I am not going to pretend I haven’t had emotional breakdowns and panic attacks with my financial advisor regarding the purchase of multiple properties, the large sums of money I was responsible for kept me up at night and I was terrified of being house poor. Allowing yourself to feel your emotions around money is perfectly okay just be mindful they are not the ones making the decisions.
Where To Start
- Understand The Flow Of Your Money – what are your source(s) of income, where and how are you spending your money, how much are you saving? (I like using a budget spreadsheet but many financial institutions offer this feature when you sign up for online banking – keeps you honest real time!)
- Change Your Money Mindset – based on where your money is going, evaluate the non-essentials and ask yourself can you make changes? Can you setup automatic withdrawals into a savings account? (I love doing this because if I don’t see it, I can’t spend it!) You could move this money into a tax-free saving accounts for that rainy day. No amount is too small or too large, save what you can! You can always adjust the amount later on.
- You Are Not Alone – Building wealth isn’t a solo sport, ask for help. Finding a financial advisor that fits with you is important because this is a relationship not a transaction. Their job is to help you achieve your financial goals and work through your emotions to help you make the best decisions. You want to create a dream team of subject matter experts to help you build your financial freedom.
Reference Material:
Books – (i) Worry-Free Money by Shannon Lee Simons; (ii) Invested by Danielle Town
https://www.clevergirlfinance.com/blog/best-financial-literacy-books-for-women/
